Survivor: Constitution to be Channel Ten’s new ratings winner

New owners CBS have demanded results after bailing out the troubled network. Arming them with only a deadline and a giant bag of cocaine, the American TV network has told embattled Channel Ten executives to come up with a quick win in the ratings.

Survivor: Constitution is what they found at the bottom of that bag.

Set inside parliament house, viewers will be treated with the spectacle of watching senior politicians inflate their own sense of self-importance by ridiculing other members for being eliminated under Section 44 of the Constitution.

The real twist comes when the loudest mockers are then eliminated under the same rules.

Viewers will also get to see feats of moral gymnastics as politicians dart and squirm to avoid elimination, trying to argue that the exact same section doesn’t apply to their incredibly similar circumstances.

Early fears were that there would not be enough content, that surely no one else could be stupid enough to still get caught.

Upon hearing this, Derryn Hinch’s only response was “hold my beer.”

The CentreLine can also reveal other contenders for the name of the program:

Who Wants To Be An Australian?

So You Think You’re Eligible For Parliament?

Australia’s Got Dual Citizens

Go Back To Where You Came From

The Section 44 Report

I still call Australia Canada/England/India/America/New Zealand Home

I’m A Dual Citizen, Get Me Out Of Here!

House of Representatives Rules

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