BREAKING: North Korean pissing competition escalates

Following North Korea’s missile test, President Trump has responded in the only way he knows how.

In response to Kim Jong Un pulling his choad out in the world’s worst dick-measuring competition, Mr Trump held a press conference where he showed a live feed of a joint US/South Korean missile “test”.

After the launch, Mr Trump proceeded to drop his pants and take a massive shit in front of the lectern before pulling them back up, saying “mine’s bigger” and walking away.

The Centreline will keep you updated throughout the evening with further developments. Probably.

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