One month on from the federal budget, local man Shane Philpot has declared that things have never looked better for his Port Hedland 3 bedroom investment property.
Speaking to the Centreline from the bar at the Esplanade Hotel, Shane declared “I bought for $1.1m in late 2011, and the bank’s just revalued at $260,000, so I can negative gear the fuck out of it!”
“If the Libs had punted it, it’d be touch and go in between Uber and flogging shards for a mate of mine. As it happens, I’ve still had to make some sacrifices” he indicated, pocketing a half smoked dart from the ashtray on the patio.
“Misso reckons we could rent out the tray of the Maloo, negative gear the cunt as well. Yeah, nah, trying it on with the jet skis too’d be taking this piss though, you reckon?”